PHHH #948.9

Date: Wednesday, August 13, 2003

Weather: Fungal

Location: Stony Brook Conservation Area

Time: 40 minutes

Hare: Wacko

Hounds: Hand Solo, Hey YO! Paully, Brian Craybill, Chris and Adam 
        the Polish Twins, Lev Hoffman, Nonsensei, Henrik, Ouipee, 
        Cindy Ginsberg (nka The Red-Faced Chugger), Safe Sweats

Virgins: Kate Hanley, Darren Szuch, Dan Hnatt, Tshilolo Tshiongo
Seen at the On-in: Glenn Palmer

Princeton Market in Sharp Rise--Corner Turned?
Fast Won't Last, say analysts
Seoul Cooking Coming?

A dramatic run from the opening bell saw the Princeton Hash rocket 
skyward in a way not seen in two years.  The market leader was 
caught flat-footed by four extreme sport speculators and a youth 
movement that sucked down-down almost as many cheap beers as minutes 
run in a short session.  Investors gathered from Eastern Europe, the 
chemical industry, and in a promising debut, the Congo, to push the 
crowd.  Rookie investors from the weeks preceding were not deterred 
by the hothouse climate of the market, spurning warnings of shiggy 
and poison ivy while fanning out on trail and following the old cold 
bulls on clockwise cyclical run for the nachos.  Veterans were 
almost in tune and in circle during two down-downs, an event unheard 
of in recent years.  Analysts foresaw strong runs in calamine and 
steel brush futures as a result, and traditional rejection of 
Domeboro solution, whose effectiveness is undermined by a deceptive 
low P/E ratio.  The surge in coed buy-ins and short sales in the 
girlfriend sector promises to fuel the appearance of even more males 
next week, despite rising uncertainty over directions to Fort Dix 
and the North Korea situation.

"It won't last," said Charlotte Eugene, noted hash analyst. "Three
shiggy-less hashes, 45-minute flatland runs, and 80-degree weather, 
and my grandmother could hash without leaving her urn.  Hell, 
Weepii's mother was first to keg a month ago.  Once Pyro sets again, 
they'll be back to two hounds before you can pop a pustule."

Next: Madame Butterfly sets an aria as Weapea flies east to find a 
Russian bride. Hand, count the cash!