PRINCETON HHH HASH #750.4

Date: December 26, 1999
Weather: Leather
Venue: Ewing - somewhere off 95/295
Set by: Throatwarbler Mangrove
Hashers: Hey Yo Paully, Juicy, Geezer, Solo, Pyroman, Speed Bumps, The Excitable
Boy, Discomfort, Tropical Depression, Minor Tom, Llloda, Randy Rodgers, Ice Blue
Balls, Table Toes, Wrong Way

Rookies: Laura Solosdottir

Descriptions, Polemics, and Lies:

        In a pitiful attempt to win "Worst Venue of the Year," Throatwarbler set an
ashfault-ridden run through the developments and soon to be post industrial parks of
somewhere. I only heard about it because I dropped in to the Belle Meade Inn last
night to find out what Zaire and the Assassin were doing about the Coming
Apocalypse. I found the two of them conspiring over their usual Stegmaiers, and in a
jolly mood. Zaire had just returned from a couple of weeks in Pyongyang with Rojo,
and the ominous air of malevolence that usually taints the basement of the Inn was
mercifully absent. Jorge lounged sleepily against the far wall, right under the photo of
Ronald Reagan, scarred by so many direct hits by half empty Steg bottles. Rojo sat in
the corner, a sleepy smile on her face as she quietly dreamed of whips and chains.

         "A fitting end to the Year of the Debacle," said Zaire, when he heard of the
Warbler's effort, "Anyway, I preferred the Year of the Whine. What's next? If this one
was any prelude, it might be The Year of Pain and Suffering. Or the Year of
Annihilation! Or the Year of Emptiness. Emptiness for those feeble wankers, anyway."

        "I don't know," countered The old Cuban, scratching the scar that ran over
the top of his head from one ear to the other, "I wonder if there will even be a next
year." 

        "We're ready," replied Zaire with a chilling smile, looking meaningfully at
Rojo and the cases of Stegmaier stacked against the wall, "I had Jorge lay in a supply,
and I don't think much else matters. When civilization falls, I don't expect we'll have
any real problems."Jorge opened another Steg, tossing the empty on the impressive
pile in the corner.

        The Assassin didn't even flinch at Zaire's use of "when" not "if." I couldn’t
help wondering what the big Cuban knew.

        But you don't care about what the Assassin knows, or what Rojo is doing in
this story, or even about the coming the End of the World As We Know it, do you? Of
course not - all you care about is............The 1999 End of Year Report. Here it is.