PRINCETON HHH HASH #744.4 Date: November 14, 1999 Weather: Pre-blustery Venue: Watershed Time: oh, let's just call it an hour (or 48 minutes Rojo time) Set By: Juicy Shoes Hashers: Tropical Depression, Hey YO! Paully, Tabletoes, Throat Deep, RoJo, Rubber Allen, Llloda, Excremental Earnings, Tomoko, Schwaaa!, John Smallberries, Uranus Williams, Booger, Squirrel Droppings, Weepee Rookies: Nikki "Juicy/Toes's pal" Highsmith, Chris "Nikki's pal", and Jeff PleasegivemeanAgeezer DESCRIPTIONS, LIES AND POLEMICS "Never Apologize for a Set - Even When You Should" Some things never change in the world of the PHHH. While the occasional hash may have more women than men (don't tell Rojo, she might go run with Rumson), Paully may occasionally run with his clothes on, and the LRF may actually run with us again, other things never change. All of these things may occur at one point or another - but some things it seems will never change - such as Juicy's apologetic anti-hype before her sets. And so it was again as Rojo and Toes conversed with our wet hare at the start in the Watershed (where a casual glance at the archives indicates that at least two other hashes have come through this territory this year alone - ok, granted this scribe's research did not actually include looking at the archive, but instead was limited to remembering that there actually is an archive of hash reports on the web, but anyway, but I digress). Juicy had barely said hello before she invoked the spirit of her now infamous "I'm really kind of worried about this set" pre-apologizing remark from yesteryear: - oh it took me all day to set, - oh I walked the terrain to the end then set it backwards, - oh I got lost, - oh my knee hurts - oh I ran into a wall of shiggy and didn't set any marks for a while - oh I know its too short - oh its a boring set oh boo hoo hoo hoo hoo Alright, enough already - no more apologizing for your set. Especially no apologizing before the fact. From now on take note of our grand dominatrix. If you ask her, every hash she sets is of course the best most wondrous run in the history of the PHHH, through glorious countryside (even if it is in Bucks County). Or take on the attitude of our beloved Geezer - "If you don't like it, go set yourself, I'm going to go watch the Giants." or our good friend Pyro "It is the best set of the year. I know it is, even if I'm about to do a live hare - It will be the hash to end all hashes.... and there will be Oreo's and pork rinds at the on in." Quite simply, if anyone is halfbraned enough to come out in the first place, well then, it's their own damn fault. Be proud, stand tall (I know that's hard for Juicy, but try, maybe use a stepstool or something) and declare that no matter how bad your set really is, it is the most deceptive, difficult, shiggious hash through the best new territory the PHHH has ever seen for the third or fourth time. What all of this has to do with the actual hash, is really nothing. because, in spite of Juicy's apologies and anti-hype, she actually set a hash that, when compared to the other generally poor quality and debacle-filled efforts that have preceded her this year, wasn't too extraordinarily bad. She apparently invoked Solo's description of a hash and had the pack Gambol through pristine woods on the gentle sylvan trails of the watershed; had the pack Run by and through babbling brooks and bucolic waterfalls and actually included a false trail or two. The trail eventually led to her apologetic stream surrounded by shiggy (where the aforementioned lack of marks did sort of dwindle for a bit. To a semi-regroup by the bowels of a disemboweled deer (Paully thought he had found some foie gras, but the local vultures would not let him get close enough for a taste). A thoughtful discussion then ensued as to whether it was the liver, small intestine, gizzard, or reproductive organs of the once and former deer - a brief moment of silence for Bambi's mother please. From the disemboweled regroup the trail proceeded to pound the pavement to a real regroup with beer and Juicy juice and water - and then off again down the road, back into the woods and through a semi-chilled stream that Schwaa! tried vainly to cross in leaps and bounds without getting her feet wet. From there, over hill and dale to a well stocked golf-club parking lot apres with homemade wings, decent beer and even leftover Sarnoff corporate muckety-muck desserts from Weepee. There were even rookie and birthday downdowns (for Excremental Earnings). All that was missing was some bitter melon and turkey tails - oh and a Paully who apparently decided to run by the on in and go looking for the trail somewhere else (and Juicy was worried that she had set a debacle - if Paully got lost, it must have been a hash), and a Booger, who had arrived late and was found waiting at the regroup in his car - apparently Booger had somehow managed to drive the entire trail to that point. Where did that leave us - well with about 7 minutes to spare before the golf course guy closed the gates - potentially leaving the pack to play golf all night long until the gates would open the next morning. And of course the golf-club environs confused the late arriving Paully when the call for drivers was made - "But I only have a 5 Iron." UPCOMING HASHES - volunteer or feel the wrath ...., yada yada yada #745.4, Sunday, Nov 21, 2 pm, 87 Prospect, Tropical Depression and Ice Blue Balls set the soft core hash. #746.4, Sunday, Nov 28, 2 pm, 87 Prospect, Throat Deep sets??? or Wacko Sets - SOMEBODY DECIDE #747.4, Sunday, Dec 5, 2 pm, 87 Prospect, Geezer sets. #748.4, Sunday, Dec 12, 2 pm, 87 Prospect, ????? sets #749.4, Sunday, Dec 19, 2 pm, 87 Prospect, HeyYo! Paully claims the pavement-pounding holiday cheer-ing Winter Solstice hash. #750.4, Sunday, Dec 26, ??? sets the Canadian Boxing Day hash??? #751.4, Sunday, Jan 2, Pyroman sets into the new millennium. God help us.