Princeton HHH HASH # 287.4
Date: November 25, 1990 
Weather: Wrangling
Set by: Throatwarbler
Runners: LRF, Dr. No, Geezer, Fluke Leming, Dinos, Solo, Larry Sleeper
"First to Cooler"  Joe Burns
 
Description, comments: In Lapland, when, in their relentless search for extinction, the 
lemings* cascade over any available precipice, there is the occasional leming who is diverted 
from the general rush to destruction.  On seeing such a leming one day, Olof Lappingstørter 
said to his buddy Rena Størtingslappir, “Say, Rena, there’s a really smart leming (løminsvoltir).”  
Rena replied, “ No you stupid old Lapp, he’s no smarter than you. That’s just a Fluke Leming.”  

 *(Or “lemmings,” as the translation from the old Lapp is uncertain on this point.  In old Lapp, it 
is “Løminsvoltir”  which translates into “leming,” whereas in newer Lapp it is “lømminsveltir,” 
which is appropriately rendered as “lemming.”  We have adopted the suggestion of the O.L.D. 
and used the old Lapp.)

But this isn’t about Lapland.  Instead it is about:

                       Beyond the Fringe of Suburban America
It is hard to imagine that the heavily over-hashed turf so favored by the Throatwarbler could 
yield new territory.  Still less probable is the notion that this intellectually deficient pack could be 
led to deep insights into the condition of present-day America by a run through the back yards 
of Lawrenceville and environs.  Still it’s true.  What lies just past the fragile facade?  Exactly 
what hideous secrets are revealed by a peek past the white picket fence at the end of the 
garden?  Not much, actually.   The main conclusion is that there’s a lot of junk out there and it 
seems to spawn big thorns.  We ran through the streets of Lawrenceville dipping now and then 
into the secret wastes beyond the manicured walks and pristine lawns. The twin peaks of the 
day were a vast drive-in movie parking lot, rotting quietly behind a fence along a typical 
suburban lane.  The huge decaying screen now looms over ghosts of teenagers curled up in 
‘58 Chevies watching “The Blob that Ate Borneo.”  The pack ran through this impressive relic 
with appropriate reverence, back onto the streets and along a stretch of the canal fit for some 
smarmy calendar.  But then we dived into an unbelievable wasteland of thorns and rubble.  
Thirty years of the detritus of the desperate lives of the ostensibly respectable homeowners 
living on the verge of this horrid heap were pounded further into the muck by the pack.  As we 
traversed the thorn-guarded empty bottles and dead tires cast away by thousands of tax-paying 
commuters, the pathetic cries of “Are you” became ever more frantic, and in many cases, quite 
pathetically faint. Finally, we emerged into the rear of a sordid warehouse, doubtless a mere 
holding pen for more tires and bottles, and were rescued as Fluke Leming found the beer.
NEXT HASHES:
Sunday, December 2,	10 am	#288.4	Road Trip to Reading Meet at 			Geezer’s House, 111 Fitzrandolph, 10 am, 924-6533 (258-3909)
Sunday, December 9,	2 pm	#289.4	Dr. No sets
Sunday, December 16,	2 pm	#290.4	The Man from Monrovia sets?
Sunday, December 23,	2 pm	#291.4	Saddam Hussein/George Bush set
Sunday, December 30, 	2 pm	#292.4	Postage Paid sets?