PHHH #1165.9

Date: Sunday, September 9, 2007

Place: Beautiful downtown Bristol, Pa., across the street from the 
new statue of Bristol's local Civil War hero

Weather: Inclemently hot

Time: 1:55, not including bevy break

Hares: Itemized Seduction & Cliffdiver

Hounds: Hand Solo, Hey YO! Paully, Pyroman, Speedbumps, Oliver the 
Wonder Dog, Wouipei, Queef, Quackenbush III

Rookie: Brotherly Love

Heard at the on-in: "I have trouble keeping it straight" Ouipee, 
allegedly about his canoe-handling skills

Description, Polemics, and Lies: Double Feature

They tried, we're sure they did, and to be sure it was 50 minutes 
shorter than last winter's Super Bowl Hard Core set 
(www.princetonol. com/groups/ phhh/archive/ 1132.9.txt) . "It only took 
us three hours to set," said Itemized proudly. "The first part has 
lots of shiggy, the second has lots of trails, and we'll have drinks 
for you between them."

The memory becomes somewhat glazed with sweat, edible cheese-flavored 
polymers, and Oliver's saliva-slicked chocolate chip cookies, but it 
struck your humble correspondent that much of the shiggy was self-
inflicted. His was, in any event. What we remember most is a great 
many check marks with check 1's located a comfortable distance 
appropriate on a Wacko set, and they didn't cover all the paved 
intersections constituting natural checks. Also, the somewhat 
erratic nature of flour deposition, which is hardly unique to these 
hares, who helpfully kept us on obvious trails and then, Solomon 
Grundy-like, grudgingly cadged out flour for the numerous checkmarks 
on the return to downtown Bristol, home of the secretive and powerful 
Grundy Foundation. No doubt Itemized is on the board of directors.

There were plenty of pleasant trails on Part I, and just as many on 
Part II, which Itemized assured the electrolytically depleted was 
only half as long as the 55-minute Part I. Fighting impulses to go 
jump in the lake across the street instead, the pack, sans a panting 
Oliver, headed into the woods, where Bumps pulled her patented face-
plant on a stray pine needle, and where we found a father about to 
show his son how to strangle the garter snake that he was holding on 
the nature trail.

With Pyro observing the lame and the halt of the PHHH trudging across 
the Parking Lot at the End of Bristol, he heartily concluded that we 
were on the verge of finishing two hashes, we got to the sumptuous on-
in next to a sewer pipe on a Delaware River beach that will never 
match Miami's or even Manayunk's. The hounds being too exhausted to 
take up kayaking, Cliffie set out and practically crossed the 
Delaware and back in 10 minutes, luring Paully into a trip to a light 
tower in mid-stream. The rest of us enjoyed Itemized's birthday 
cheesecake since she won't be around next week, and neither will the 
rest of us, unless someone volunteers.

Step right up--the Louisiana Reptile Fancier is undoubtedly dangling 
no-credit PHHH participation to his PU charges now that Geezer's Orgo 
feeder system has dried up!